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May 10 2011 – Tip #279
- by Ann Weiser Cornell"Can I use my Focusing skills with the sensations stimulated in an acupuncture treatment?"~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Pamela writes: "I recently had an acupuncture treatment and was surprised to feel a bit overwhelmed by the sensations and feelings stimulated in my body. Could I use my Focusing skills to help if I have another session – or the next time I have some dental treatment?"Dear Pamela,Yes indeed you can. One of the great uses of a Focusing type of awareness is to help us handle and be more at ease with strong feelings of any kind, whether they are emotions or sensations.So you were…
Ann Weiser CornellMay 3 2011 – Tip #278
- by Ann Weiser Cornell"Can I focus with the tension I feel when I wake up in the morning?"~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Chris asks: "Often when I wake up in the morning, I feel tension all through my body. Is that something I can do Focusing with? "If yes, how would I do that? Do I need to sit up, move to a chair? Or can I just do Focusing immediately, right there in bed?"Dear Chris,I love the way that Focusing is something you can have with you all the time, any time you need it.And for many of us, first thing in the morning can be a difficult…
Ann Weiser CornellApril 27 2011 – Tip #277
- by Ann Weiser Cornell"I'm dipping into my retirement savings and my passion for my work is waning."~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~John writes: "I have a job in which I used to do quite well. Now, however, it is not going very well, especially financially. I'm on straight commission, I'm scheduled to make $5,000 this year. As small as this amount is, it takes care of my health insurance and car. (I have an additional revenue stream that will end in a couple of years but I am still having to make big dips into my retirement savings). My passion for this work is waning yet I am…
Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #276: “I’m no good, useless, a failure…”
- by Ann Weiser Cornell“It’s a part that says ‘I’m no good, useless, bad, a failure, crap.” Wendy writes: “I wonder if you can give me some tips about working with a part of me that comes up regularly. It’s a part that says ‘I’m no good, useless, bad, a failure, crap.’ It can come up regardless of anything I am or am not doing in the world it seems — more like a core belief that gets activated and then with it are all sorts of really uncomfortable feelings — shame, sobbing, rage, despair/helplessness, etc. At such times, it’s quite hard to operate in the world although…
Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #275: Being with Strong Feelings of Anger
- by Ann Weiser Cornell“A part of me wanted to hurt my son, and didn’t want me to do Focusing.” Silvia writes: “I had a question coming up this weekend. Had a hard time with my oldest son, and found a part that really wanted to hurt him, and managed to just be with that part. It was a lot easier (before I would just freak out when something like that came up) because I have the trust now that when something is ready it will change, and that resisting it will only make it persist. “I was standing in the kitchen this morning…
Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #274: Focusing with Health Issues
- by Ann Weiser Cornell“Can Focusing help me when the issues are health related?” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Joan writes: “I am 52, in menopause, and life has turned upside down it seems. I have very frequent heart palpitations that last for hours. Muscle twitching, headaches, some numbness in arms at times, and discomfort. I have a torn labrum in my hip from running. And lastly, and this I really don’t like, I have bad acid reflux and constipation. “Prior to the start of all these symptoms, Aug 2010, I did not take any medication except vitamins, ever in my life. I want my body back. I…
Ann Weiser CornellMarch 29 2011 – Tip #273
- by Ann Weiser Cornell"Can I invite a part to come forward that might have insight for me?"~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Lesta writes: "I would like to know if the following would be OK."If I'm in the middle of a focusing session working on an issue, and a few parts feel resolved into a good place and nothing more is happening, then is it OK to ask for a part to come forward who (for example) has to do with or connected with what a particular experience I had on Tuesday that is unresolved with this person that I'm having this issue with? "Or to ask a part…
Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #272: “I am often furious, and very ashamed of it.”
- by Ann Weiser CornellHow do we “untangle” when feelings seem to react & stimulate each other? Torie writes: “I am often furious, very ashamed of it and avoid telling people about it because it has gone on for a long time. I do try Focusing but it only helps momentarily. I can find a kind inner voice for a bit but again it doesn’t last. I know these things do keep coming back and I need to be patient. “The fury is, on the surface, with my husband not clearing up after himself in so many ways, and I feel like a disrespected drudge.…
Ann Weiser CornellMarch 15, 2011 – Tip #271
- by Ann Weiser Cornell"I'm feeling sad for all those people who are hurt."~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~That's what my friend Tina wrote to me this week, talking about the people suffering in Japan after the earthquake and tsunami last Friday. I knew what she meant, I was feeling an aching in my own heart.Sometimes we wonder if it's OK to let ourselves feel the sadness from a big disaster. Maybe the feelings will be too big. Maybe they will open up other feelings: feeling powerless to help, or scared about something like that happening to our own self and family.And sometimes we might forget that the process…
Ann Weiser CornellMarch 8, 2011 – Tip #270
- by Ann Weiser Cornell"The next day you were able to write… Was it really that easy?"~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Chris writes: "I was just reading your personal story on your web site with which you touched and inspired me again…. But one thing you told, puzzled me."You wrote about how you were Focusing with your writer's block and how you were speaking with the part that didn't want to write. And you were getting this clear picture of being shot at and that was leading you to the feeling you had as a child, being shot at by the sarcasm of your father. And the next day…
Ann Weiser Cornell