Living a Focusing Life – Ann’s Blog

Focusing opens up a vibrantly rich dimension of possibility, beyond either/or, beyond stuck, moving into a world of creative originality that is our birthright. Creative Originality Every moment of your life, it is possible to know and cherish your absolute uniqueness. Or it is possible to be in a rut, a cog in a machine, an interchangeable part. We are not machines! Yet the “linear model” encoded in our language and worldview tempts us to see ourselves that way. We have the emotions that “anyone” would have (“Of course I was angry! Wouldn’t you be?”) and we feel ourselves in…

Focusing gets you in touch with what is real and true, and you discover that the facts are friendly! Know Thyself Last week I visited the astonishing ancient site of Delphi, in Greece. In reading about it, I learned that Socrates’ famous phrase–“Know thyself”–came from the oracle at Delphi. As I look back over 33 years with Focusing, I feel one of the greatest gifts of “Living a Focusing Life” is knowing myself. But that isn’t just a “head” knowing. It isn’t an analytical knowing. It’s a deep sense of contact, of being “with” myself, being “in” who I am.…

Focusing is helpful for all kinds of issues, all kinds of people. As we mentioned last week, Focusing helps both if you’re feeling “too much,” and if you’re feeling “too little.” Feeling “Too Little” When I first tried to learn Focusing, I didn’t know how I felt. I didn’t have access to my own wants, needs, emotions. It was easier for me to tell how someone else was feeling than to know that about myself. Focusing was a revelation for me. For the first time that I could remember, I began to know how I felt. Yes, I really hadn’t…

Focusing is helpful for all kinds of issues, all kinds of people. For example, Focusing helps both if you’re feeling “too much,” and if you’re feeling “too little.” Feeling “Too Much” I put the words “too much” in quotation marks, because of course in Focusing we are accepting of all inner experiences, including strong feelings. But Focusing is uniquely helpful when feelings are strong, because we learn about a “third way” to be with feelings. When I was growing up in the Midwest, we learned only two ways to be with feelings. (1) If possible, don’t feel anything! At least…

What is different about Focusing? Allowing a felt sense to form is already a relief to the problem! What Brings Relief and Release How is it that allowing a felt sense to form is already a relief to the problem? Why do we see a Focusing person smile and relax when finding an exactly-right name for what they feel, even when it is something awful? Try it yourself: a felt sense is a body sense of “all that,” the whole issue or situation you’re dealing with. You’ll need to pause, take time, and sense inwardly, in order to let this…

Living a Focusing life means getting closer and closer to knowing how you feel and what you want at each moment. Tips for Focusing Alone Remember that Focusing alone (also known as Solo Focusing) is something you can do formally, as in sitting down and saying “I am doing Focusing now”–or you can do Focusing informally, in little mini-moments throughout the day. The more you practice Focusing, the more you will be able to have it with you when you need it, in a phone call, a meeting, or a difficult relationship discussion. You’ll be able to say, “I need…

Living a Focusing life means living in process… Tips for Focusing Alone One thing that can help your Focusing alone is to say hello first to everything that is in the way of Focusing alone. These don’t need to be distractions, they can each be “doorways” into a deeper process. Instead of struggling with the annoying construction noise in the street, you may find yourself going deeper into an exploration of how you are when such things happen. Tips for Focusing with a Partner My motto for Focusing partnership is: Empowered Focuser, Relaxed Companion. The more the Focuser (the one…

Living a Focusing life means encountering each moment freshly, understanding that we have never encountered this moment and all it means ever before! Tips for Focusing Alone This week: the final of three ways of using art materials to support your Focusing alone. This is a nice one for people who don’t like to draw! You might have heard of this one from other contexts, it’s called Mind Mapping. Start with one word or phrase that you want this Focusing session to be about. Then write it in the center of a white sheet of paper. (Larger paper might be…

Living a Focusing life means understanding that the categories with which we understand the world are just approximations of what we directly encounter, and if we choose to, we can stand face-to-face what what is real: the here-and-now felt experience. Tips for Focusing Alone This week: the second of three ways of using art materials to support your Focusing alone. This one is called: Sketching the story of the session. Draw (sketch, doodle) a quick picture of the felt situation. So if you’re sensing that the situation you’re Focusing on “feels like being on stage,” you would draw a little…

Living a Focusing life means bringing awareness to how you are. Your body is always ready to give you a felt sense of the situation you’re in. Like a wise inner guide who’s always with you! Questions? Anything about Focusing? Just email me at awcornel@pacbell.net and I’ll address your question in future posts. Tips for Focusing Alone We’re going to talk about three ways of using art materials to support your Focusing alone. This week, the first way: Drawing your felt sense. If your felt sense has a visual quality, a shape, a color, you can draw it, and then…