Was that image just distracting me?
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Betty asks: "How can I tell if something is just distracting me from dealing with an issue? A few days ago I was focusing with my partner. I had invited in the whole issue of eating. I did get some subtle body sensations but then an image came up. For some reason I knew that it was just a distraction. I acknowledged it as a distraction and went back to sensing into my body. I got a sensation in the chest area and stayed with that. Fairly quickly a very emotional and deep issue came up. The rest of the session went slow and deep after a little hiding on its part.
"I was surprised that I recognized this image as a distraction and that there might be a subtle form of distracting going on in my Focusing process. I remember getting this image a lot when I first started Focusing. Any tips on recognizing something that might be trying take my attention away from an issue or is it all good and I should just be in presence with all of it?"
Dear Betty,
Let’s start by appreciating that you DID recognize it as a distraction! The "proof" is in what happened next–you were able to get back to Focusing and have a deeply connected session.
But what IS a distraction, really? If as you say it is something in you that is TRYING to take your attention away from an issue, let’s assume that it thinks it has a good reason to do that. It’s trying to take your attention away from the issue for some good reason.
In this case the issue was "eating." Maybe something in you was not wanting you to get into that issue. I can imagine all kinds of reasons it might have! No matter what its reasons, the whole inner dynamic will be eased if you turn toward something trying to distract and respectfully listen for a while to what it doesn’t want. After that you’ll be able to get back to the main issue with a stronger sense of Presence.
"I accept this completely and…"
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In terms of recognizing which images are distractions, we need to have a kind of "both/and" quality of awareness. Yes, we accept whatever comes to awareness. AND many things happen in consciousness which are not on the direct forward track of the felt sense! I might feel hungry, wonder if I filled the birdbath, have an itch on the end of my nose…
So there is a process of discernment, of "focusing" if you will, on what is on track, what is part of the process as invited. If we make that track too narrow, we’ll leave out important aspects. For example, I’ve seen people who pushed away everything that seemed to come from their "minds." You can leave out some very important information that way!
So I’ve learned to make the track pretty wide, to keep my focus soft. Most things can get my attention when I’m Focusing: images, thoughts, feelings, memories, stories… but whether they stay in my attention or not after a first recognition depends on an inner feeling of "yes, that connects somehow." It’s not an intellectual knowing, more something that comes from inside… and gets easier with practice.
