Focusing Tip #699 – How can Focusing help when the world is so scary?
What can you do when you feel taken over by fear, and what you’re scared of is real? Read on…
A Reader writes:
Focusing is listening quietly inside, and changing yourself.
But what good is that when so many bad things are coming from the outside, and out of my control? How can I not be scared when there are so many actual things to be scared about?
There’s something very interesting about fear… about being scared.
When we’re taken over by it, it’s as if the threat is certain. Real. Right here, right now.
But in most cases, the things we’re scared about are not here right now. They’re off in the future somewhere. And not certain.
The part of us that is scared feels like the threat is here now. The truth is, it’s not. There is a danger… but it can be prepared for and often even prevented.
When we’re taken over by fear, we can’t think as well. We’re “activated,” full of adrenalin. That’s a good state for fighting or running… but it’s not a good state for assessing actual risks and thinking clearly about what to do about them.
That’s why I teach a simple method for not being taken over by fear.
- ONE: Pause. Choose to take a bit of time. Go ahead, you can do it!
- TWO: Sense how you are actually feeling, right now. Include the feeling that is in your body. This might surprise you!
- THREE: Say, “I am sensing something in me feels _____________.”
Say it that way, even if it feels like all of you. Say it three or four times. And add: “I am saying Hello to that.”
Notice how that feels now…
One more thing: It’s not the purpose of this to make the scared part of you not be scared. It can still be scared. It’s just that now, you are bigger.