Wondering how to bring Focusing to your therapy clients? Read on…
A Reader writes:
I’m intrigued by what I know about Focusing and I want to offer it to my therapy clients.
But what do you say to those who can’t sense what’s happening in their body? And to those who feel active resistance to going inside?
Dear Reader:
Good for you for wanting to offer Focusing to your therapy clients. Inner Relationship Focusing can be smoothly integrated into any type of psychotherapy or emotional healing work.
But you’re right, not everyone responds well to an invitation to feel in the body. This could have all kinds of reasons.
Many people have a conception of the body as purely physical, a place where they have aches and pains, but not emotions and meaning. And for many survivors of trauma, the “body” is an unsafe place they’d rather stay away from.
So what can we do? We can use invitations into Focusing that don’t mention the word “body.”
Let’s say your client is telling a story about what happened last week. It’s one event after another… but you’d like to invite him to feel into what it all means, and what’s important about it now.
Instead of “How does that feel in your body?”, you could say instead, “Let’s pause a moment, OK? Maybe there’s a way all that sits in you now…”
Or say, “Perhaps you can pause and get the feel of all that, right now.”
Yes, this may still sound like an odd invitation to people who are used to “just talking”! If it falls on deaf ears, just wait, keep listening, and try again another time.
It’s your own confidence that Focusing works that will ultimately get through to your clients. So even if your client isn’t sensing inside — yet — be sure to be in touch with your own felt senses. That’s the most facilitative move of all!
