Focusing Tip #760 – “Maybe being truly relaxed is too good to be true.”

Focusing Tip #760 – “Maybe being truly relaxed is too good to be true.”
July 14, 2021 Ann Weiser Cornell
Being truly relaxed in my body would be too good to be true

Focusing Tip #760 – “Maybe being truly relaxed is too good to be true.”

When your stressful feelings don’t change, is it ever because change itself is scary? Read on…

Maria writes:

I’ve been Focusing for a while and I feel I’ve made progress with some of my inner questions. But I still feel a level of tension in my body.

Part of me thinks I won’t be able to be free from this tension. It’s like that would be too good to be true, to be truly relaxed in my body.

Dear Maria:

It’s so interesting how often a part of us holds back from change… any change, even in a positive direction.

The way it is now feels so familiar! Even comforting, in how familiar it is.

If I didn’t have this tension… or this heaviness… or this constant sense of vigilance — who would I be?

Well… you would be in a new world. One that you can let your body explore. You don’t have to know in advance what it would be like.

So you might sit with the sense of the tension in your body now… and take your time… with no agenda but to get to know it better. After a while, you’ll be able to feel how it feels from its point of view.

Maybe it’s something that’s been holding on, scared to let go. For some good reason.

Whatever it is (and it may surprise you), you can let it know you hear it.

Above all, it’s the quality of your relationship with it that matters, not any information you get.

That’s what brings change: Gentle, empathic presence.

And if you discover that something in you isn’t ready for change— well, you can be gentle with that too!


You May Also Benefit From These Resources:

Radical Gentleness: The Transformation of the Inner Critic Article

When Your Felt Sense Speaks to You…What to Say Back Article

SHIFT: A 6-week On-Demand Course to help you communicate well, feel better, and know what to do next… 



Leave a reply

Your email address will not be published.




Sign up here and get your first lesson right away.

Thank you! Your first lesson is on its way to your inbox. If you don't see it in the next couple hours, be sure to check your SPAM folder (or Promotions tab in GMail)