Focusing Tip #619 – What if you feel so ashamed, you just want to disappear?

A Reader writes:

In my Focusing I sensed a part of me which feels so ashamed, that it has the strong wish to just disappear. It simply does not want to be here, or it believes it should not be here. It’s like there is no place in the world for it.

Dear Reader:

It’s good that you were able to get in touch with a part like that, that’s so ashamed it wants to disappear. To me it speaks of the inner safety and presence you were able to create.

Because that kind of part usually hides!

And then even from its hiding place, deep inside us, it radiates its belief that it doesn’t belong in the world. From there, this feels true, and it feels like it’s you that doesn’t belong in the world, not just a part of you.

So – good for you! You’ve made contact with this ashamed part and you are sensing it as part of you, not all of you. What’s next?

Now you compassionately get to know it better. Take time to sense how things are from its point of view.

You are already sensing that it believes it should not be here. So it is not only ashamed… it has also been shamed. It got the message that there is no place for it in this world.

Or something happened that it interpreted in that way.

When a part of us feels that ashamed, there is some reason, and it is surely connected to painful past events. Shame can even be a kind of protection, in an odd way… from having to feel what actually happened.

All of this can unfold and untangle when you give this part of you your gentle, listening Presence.