How do you decide? Read on…
Chantall writes:
How do you handle the annoyance of an upstairs neighbor who walks too loud? I can say: I am noticing something in me that is annoyed with his heavy walking and I say hello to that.
But then, what do I do? Put up with it or tell him?
Dear Chantall:
I’m sorry you’re having to go through that. And I can tell you want a good relationship with your neighbor — and with yourself.
It’s a great first step to become aware that “something in you” is annoyed, and to say hello to that annoyed feeling inside. You have now paused… and pausing is powerful. In the space you have given yourself, so much is possible.
Another part comes in to say, “What do I do now? Put up with it or talk to him?” But wait… not so fast!
I invite you to take more time in that inner space you have made. There is something about the neighbor’s loud walking that feels annoying. There is something about you and your needs that makes this loud walking especially hard.
Take some time to explore and give empathy to yourself, being curious about what’s not in words yet. It’s amazing how even an ordinary occurrence like a neighbor’s noise can touch deep aspects of ourselves.
After these inner aspects have been heard, you will know what to do. Knowing what to do usually arises naturally after you have really listened to yourself.
You might enjoy a video I made about a similar situation, about what happened for a student of mine who got triggered by his upstairs neighbor making noise early in the morning. It’s called “When You Get Triggered…” and it’s one of the videos you’ll find here.
