When You’re Scared to Fail
-Do you ever experience the kind of anxiety that can really stop you in your tracks? A lot of us get anxious sometimes. I know I do! There’s a lot out there to be anxious about! But of course, feeling anxiety — the tight shoulders, the beating heart, all of that — doesn’t really help you get safer from the things you’re anxious about. You might try to get yourself to calm down and relax. Or tell yourself…
Focusing Tip #681 – “I get stuck in feeling the pain of the part.”
-Focusing Tip #681 – “I get stuck in feeling the pain of the part.” What’s the difference between feeling compassion for a hurt part of us, and being stuck in the hurt itself? Read on… Charles writes: I am an experienced Zen meditator/monk. In doing Focusing on a wounded part, I have so much empathy and compassion for the part, that I can’t seem to separate into clear Self-in-Presence. I get stuck in feeling the pain of the part, but can’t separate and just…
Fousing Tip #680 – “When Focusing, sometimes I just find a lot of pain.”
-Focusing Tip #680 – “When I do Focusing, sometimes I find a lot of pain… and it stays for a long time…” What’s going on when you experience nothing but pain? Read on… Gudrun writes: When I do Focusing, sometimes I find a lot of pain. Or hurt. And the pain feeling stays for a very long time. Just pain pain pain — in the chest, for example. I stay with it but I am unsure what else I can do. I’d appreciate any advice on…
Focusing Tip #679 – “I’ve wasted my life so far, all that energy and nothing to show for it.”
-Focusing Tip #679 – “I’ve wasted my life so far, all that energy and nothing to show for it.” Do you feel the deep frustration of having wasted too much of your life on wrong relationships, anger, and shame? Read on… Ada writes: I spoke with my dear friend and we shared a feeling: What have we done in our lives so far? So much time wasted on wrong men, feeling angry at our bosses, and basically energy lost for nothing, dieting, feeling shame.…
Focusing Tip #678 – “I feel trapped and desperate
-Focusing Tip #678 – “I feel trapped and desperate Do you feel like your current life offers you no good choices? Read on… Mia writes: I feel very trapped in my current life situation (trapped in this home, family, life, body, etc.). Every Focusing session I do reinforces this feeling of being trapped and having to find a way to “get out of this.” Yet, I have no idea, means and options to do so. I still feel lost and clueless. What would be…
Focusing Tip #677 – “Parts of me are truly unlovable.”
-Focusing Tip #677 – “Parts of me are truly unlovable.” Do you find it impossible to love the parts of you that have done hurtful and irresponsible things? Read on… Jim writes: I have a question about “unlovable” parts. When I look at my dark parts – parts that have behaved in ways that are profoundly irresponsible, that could have lead to disaster, that have hurt and possibly damaged others – those are the parts that are unlovable. I accept them, in the sense…
Focusing Tip #676 – “I have to get out of my job but I really need the money”
-Focusing Tip #676 – “I have to get out of my job but I really need the money” What if you know you have to change your life but you don’t know what to change it to? Read on… A Reader writes: If I listen to my felt sense, I know I have to change my profession or at least the work I do. But facing that change is scary. I really need the money from my current job, and what if I can’t…
Focusing Tip #675 – “I’m scared if I do Focusing I’ll have to change my life completely.”
-Focusing Tip #675 – “I’m scared if I do Focusing I’ll have to change my life completely.” Do you ever worry that if you focus on your feelings, you will have to change your life? Read on… Ada writes: Every morning I feel completely lost. Even if I had a great time the day before, it feels like all of that is deleted and all that is left is a huge emptiness. When I realize that I can focus on that emptiness, I get…
Focusing Tip #674 – What’s the difference between guidance from an inner child vs. a felt sense?
-Focusing Tip #674 – What’s the difference between guidance from an inner child vs. a felt sense? Is your inner child the best advisor for your life decisions? Read on… John writes: Some people in the groups I work with regularly look for input and guidance from their inner child self. Sometimes that seems to inform them in ways that are very similar to a felt sense, but other times it seems like they are asking their most vulnerable parts for direction. Could you…
