Focusing Tip #752 – My traumatic hospital stay – pain
-Focusing Tip #752 – “My traumatic hospital stay…” Can sensitive and empathic awareness help with the physical pain of activation? Read on… A Reader writes: Recently I had to stay in the hospital and it was very traumatic. It also triggered trauma from earlier in my life. Now, even though I am out of the hospital, I feel activation in my nervous system and body most of the time. It’s unpleasant and can be quite painful and I’m not sure what I can do…
Focusing Tip #751 – “I carry so much wounding from how my parents treated me”
-Focusing Tip #751 – “I carry so much wounding from how my parents treated me” Do you find yourself blaming others (like your parents) for your painful feelings now? Read on… A Reader writes: I keep blaming my parents for how I feel. I carry so much wounding from how they treated me, and it limits my life. How can I shift these feelings that are because of how my parents treated me? Dear Reader: “Blaming” is an interesting phenomenon. Sometimes we blame others.…
Focusing Tip #750 – “I have to be careful not to ruminate on negativity”
-Focusing Tip #750 – “I have to be careful not to ruminate on negativity.” Do depressive feelings and thoughts ever pull you in… and what do you do then? Read on… Gene writes: I have depressive episodes, and have to continually watch my thoughts that I do not ruminate and go into negativity. How do I be sure that my Focusing is not just another form of ruminating? I try to keep myself from merging with the feelings, and just observe, but that does…
Focusing Tip #749 – “My felt sense disappears when I look at it”
-Focusing Tip #749 – “My felt sense disappears when I look at it” Is your inner world a safe place for your feelings and felt senses? Read on… Cveta writes: When I’m Focusing I have the experience of the felt sense just vanishing the moment I direct attention to it, and a different felt sense appearing elsewhere. This makes it difficult to stay with something, because the something doesn’t stay with me! Dear Cveta: Yes, I know this can happen! Very disconcerting! In general…
Focusing Tip #748 – “Do you no longer ask a felt sense what it needs?”
-Focusing Tip #748 – “Do you no longer ask a felt sense what it needs?” How do you create a compassionate relationship with something that you feel? Read on… Richard writes: In your earlier writing about Focusing, one of the steps in the protocol is “I’m asking what it needs.” In the more recent materials this step is not mentioned. Do you no longer ask a felt sense what it needs? I notice, in my view at least, that the more recent materials focus…
Focusing Tip #746 – “Why do things change just because you give them attention?”
-Focusing Tip #746 – “Why do things change just because you give them attention?” Ever wonder why simple awareness can bring profound change? Read on… Annemarie writes: My therapist recommended your online course, Get Bigger Than What’s Bugging You, to me, and it was very insightful. Thank you for being the start of my healing process. There is one question that keeps lingering though. And maybe I just did not understand the nuance. But I could not understand why things change just because you…
Untangling® Musings: Parts that dig in their heels and Parts that are invisible
-What do you do when the kids refuse to clean their rooms? Just to start on the right foot here, we are referring to inner kids and metaphorical room cleaning. There’s something you need to do—or want to do—and it’s not happening. Could be cleaning or exercising or creating or having a certain difficult conversation. But however it shows…
Focusing Tip #745 – “I can’t seem to quiet my thoughts enough to sense what I deeply know.”
-Focusing Tip #745 – “I can’t seem to quiet my thoughts enough to sense what I deeply know. Does listening to your inner knowing get hijacked by your anxious thoughts? Read on… Eve writes: I’ve heard you say it’s possible to sense what I deeply know and be guided by that, but my thoughts are such a jumble. I can’t seem to quiet them enough to see through the murky water to what I deeply know. If I think I have heard what I…
Focusing Tip #744 – “What happens when there is no shift?”
-Focusing Tip #744 – “What happens when there is no shift?” What can we conclude if several Focusing sessions on the same issue don’t bring any change? Read on… Richard writes: What happens when there is no shift, just a temporary relaxing, even after several Focusing sessions on the same issue? Dear Richard: Such a good question… because we do expect Focusing to lead to real change, not just temporary relief. So when it doesn’t, we have a right to be curious about why…
Focusing Tip #742 – “My friend says he never gets felt senses.”
-Focusing Tip #742 – “My friend says he never gets felt senses.” What living at a fast pace might be preventing us from experiencing… Read on. A Reader writes: I have a friend who has been involved in Focusing for a while, as well as other awareness methods, but he says he never gets felt senses. I’m curious: Why would someone be unable to get felt senses? Dear Reader: We live in such a fast-paced, labeling/naming culture. If someone has a question, we’re supposed…
