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Meredith
writes: "I struggle with laziness. I am one of those people that excels
at everything I do and thus I can get by without doing much, creating
laziness. It drives me insane that I am not motivated to use my natural
gifts to make a big positive impact in the world."
Dear Meredith,
So you struggle with laziness. Really?
How do you know?
Imagine
that you are living with a roommate who has stopped doing her share of
the housecleaning. You are convinced this is because she is lazy. But
you haven't spoken to her in weeks. Come to find out, her dad was ill
and she was spending all her waking hours in the hospital. That's why
the cleaning didn't get done.
Sometimes we do make these guesses
about people in our lives–but in fact we make them about ourselves
even more! I find this most often in people who don't know yet how
Focusing opens up inner communications.
If you don't know Inner
Relationship Focusing yet, probably you don't have the experience of
being able to contact and listen to "the part that doesn't want
to"–and hear its side of the story.
That will involve sitting
down and sensing into your "felt sense" of that part of you, sensing it
freshly, without preconceptions. It may take a bit of time… since it
may not trust at first that you will really listen without judging. But
it's worth the time it takes. And I'll bet you'll be surprised.
"It drives me insane that I'm not motivated to use my gifts…"
Mmm.
Well, something in you is surely motivated. Clearly, something in you
is longing to use your gifts to make a big positive impact in the
world. I'd invite you to pause and really get the feel of that–the
longing or wanting to use your gifts to make a positive impact in the
world. To really feel that at a body level. From your language, I'm
guessing you'll find that's a really strong desire. So let it live,
really feel it in your body, as fully as it wants to be there.
This
part of you is likely to be feeling frustration along with its desire.
It perceives another part of you as in the way. It calls that part
"lazy." But the truth is, we don't know why something in you blocks the
way forward.
I'm terribly curious! I hope you are, too!
Curiosity is one of the prime attitudes of Self-in-Presence, and when
we are Self-in-Presence instead of being caught up in the inner wars of
blame and worry, real transformation is possible. Actually, I'd say it
has already begun.
