Focusing with a bug phobia
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Renee writes: "I have a bug phobia that absolutely takes over my entire
being when it
is triggered, and lasts for days, even weeks, with very little peace in
that time. I am wondering about how to find presence with really big
consuming issues like phobias. I am sure there must be a Focusing way
to be with this and I know finding Presence with it is essential, but
it is so hard when there is such fear there and a sense of losing
control. Any tips?"
Dear Renee,
That sounds really hard, to be taken over for weeks by a fearful part of you. I'm sorry you're having to go through that.
My
sense is that you're experiencing an extreme version of something that
happens to most of us. Fearful parts do take us over — and they do it
because they're so fearful.
These are parts of us that are
terrified of something really bad happening to us, something that
threatens our life — and they are completely untrusting that anyone is
there to help or support them. So THEY — the fearful parts — have to
mobilize, sound the alarm, hang on for dear life… as long as they
feel the threat. Which could be a long time!
Yes, the key is for
YOU to be Self-in-Presence with your fearful part. At first, and for
quite some time, you'll still feel the fear in your body. But you can
keep on saying to the fearful part, "Yes, I know you're there."
The
next step: Say to it, "I really sense how absolutely terrified you
are." Sense for the language that would match or fit the intensity of
the feeling. It's important that it feel heard and acknowledged.
"It's not wanting me to die…"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Next It's very likely that there is a resonance So we won't push. We'll respect it, and go as The patience that this takes will have a great reward… the feeling of your own life energy returning. |