Focusing Tip #750 – “I have to be careful not to ruminate on negativity.”

Do depressive feelings and thoughts ever pull you in… and what do you do then? Read on…

Gene writes:

I have depressive episodes, and have to continually watch my thoughts that I do not ruminate and go into negativity. How do I be sure that my Focusing is not just another form of ruminating? I try to keep myself from merging with the feelings, and just observe, but that does not always work, and I get pulled into depressing feelings and thoughts. Is there ever a time when I should not use focusing, and instead think positive thoughts, like “counting my blessings”?

Dear Gene:

You are already noticing when you start to get pulled into the feelings. That’s a great start! Here’s what I suggest: as soon as you notice that happening —pause and just cultivate Self-in-Presence.

You can do that by feeling your body grounding (be aware of what your feet are touching, what your seat is touching…) and looking around the room for something colorful. And then, of course, use the language of “I am sensing something in me…”

For example: “I am sensing something in me feeling depressed… and I am saying Hello to that.”

The important thing is that something in you has depressed feelings and thoughts… and it gets to feel that way… and it needs your company. You can sit with it like you would sit with a friend who is depressed, saying “I know that’s hard, and I’m here.”

There’s also something about not agreeing or disagreeing with the beliefs that that part of you is generating. “Something in me is saying that the world is a place where nothing will ever feel good… and I am here with its feelings without agreeing or disagreeing with its ideas.”

And of course if you find that counting your blessings works for you, by all means do it… and then pause and feel in your body if it helped!