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Focusing Tip #776 – “Even when I listen to them, my parts don’t change”
- by Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #776 – “Even when I listen to them, my parts don’t change” Do you wish that your obsolete parts would travel to another planet and leave you alone? Read on… Preston writes: There are parts of me that cause me misery. I know that listening to their positive intentions for me is important. When I listen, they explain that they are just trying to help me. But it is clear that these parts and their messages belong to a bygone phase of…
Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #775 – “I really want this part of me to change.”
- by Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #775 – “I really want this part of me to change.” What can you do when a part of you is blocking you from living your best life? Read on… Paul writes: I’ve heard you recommend saying to parts that they can stay the way they are as long as they need to. I’m thinking of a part that has been particularly active lately. It keeps me from living my best life. It keeps me in a state of dissociation, for periods.…
Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #774 – Inner Relationship Focusing with feelings about climate change
- by Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #774 – Focusing with feelings about climate change How can you face painful feelings about the biggest threat to existence? Read on… A Reader writes: I am deeply concerned about climate catastrophe. I’ve worked on how this resonates with my past (which it does) and I’ve spent time on how I can find hope in despair. But I feel there is more. I want to explore what it might be like to live on a planet that is dying. I want to…
Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #773 – How to respond if a friend is suffering
- by Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #773 – How to respond if a friend is suffering How do you express sympathy for a person having a hard time without getting them even more upset? Read on… A Reader writes: I nearly lost a friend recently because I expressed my sympathy in the “wrong” way. I was just trying to help but I guess she heard it as some kind of criticism and pushed back on me. We got past it, but I’m wondering… do you have a good…
Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #772 – What’s especially good about feeling good?
- by Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #772 – What’s especially good about feeling good? “Do I say hello to something in me feeling joy? Read on… Kim writes: I’ve been practicing your method of turning toward my anxious feelings with a gentle hello. I said hello to something in me that was feeling anxious about a plane trip, and wow, that brought so much relief. But then I wondered… What if I’ve got a strong good feeling, like joy? Do I say hello to something in me feeling joy?…
Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #771 – Focusing to increase confidence
- by Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #771 – Inner Relationship Focusing to increase confidence If your doubts about your abilities are in the way of moving forward, read on… A Reader writes: I want to formulate a new vision for myself, but I feel a lot of doubts about my ability to go for what I envision. How can I use Focusing to increase my sense of confidence? Dear Reader: Good for you for wanting to formulate a new vision for yourself. There is a lot of hope…
Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #770 – Inner Relationship Focusing with Longing for Connection
- by Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #770 – Inner Relationship Focusing with longing for connection How do you get a felt sense of something you wish you could feel? Read on… Clara writes: I often feel, with my mother, that there is some emotional connection that I wish were there, but it’s not. The connection I am longing for is not available. I’m not sure how to do Focusing with this. How do I get a felt sense of something I wish I could feel? Dear Clara: Ah,…
Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #769 – “I get headaches when I bring attention to the felt sense”
- by Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #769 – Emotions and the Body – “I get headaches when I bring attention to the felt sense” Do you ever get symptoms when you start to do Focusing? Read on… Pádraig writes: Since I began Focusing, I am becoming more aware of my gut and heart region. I am noticing this is having the positive effect of enabling me to feel more grounded and composed. Being someone with social anxiety, this is a first for me in many situations. I am…
Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #768 – Learning to feel your feelings
- by Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #768 – Learning to Feel Your Feelings Is it hard to just feel your feelings? Read on… Andrea writes: I’ve been finding it hard to really FEEL my feelings. And to be with them. My Mom couldn’t be with my feelings, so I learned to use my thoughts to try to manage or avoid my feelings. I want to feel deserving of being with my feelings in a kind way! Dear Andrea: You have two big things going for you already. You…
Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #767 – Do compliments make you uncomfortable?
- by Ann Weiser CornellFocusing Tip #767 – Do compliments make you uncomfortable? Do you wonder why receiving a compliment gives you a freeze reaction? Read on… Mary writes: I notice I go numb and freeze when someone offers me a compliment. What do you think that’s all about? Dear Mary: You’re doing great already, by noticing that the freezing and going numb has something to do with being offered a compliment. And you’re curious about it! That’s another great step. What do I think? I think you’re…
Ann Weiser Cornell